officialunitedstates:

did tennessee the heaven hurt when you fell from the it

  • mom: can you do me a favor?
  • me: will you pay me?
  • mom: why do i have to pay you to do me a favor?
  • me: Humankind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost. That is Alchemy's First Law of Equivalent Exchange.

jakewhyman:

Deadpool Test Footage (x)

Make the damn movie already, Fox!

(Source: badassbilinski)

  • child I am babysitting: How do you get grownup teeth?
  • me: You lose your baby teeth
  • child I am babysitting: they fall out!?
  • me: they fall out
  • child I am babysitting: do you still have your baby eyes?
  • me:
  • child I am babysitting: or did they fall out
  • me:
  • me:
  • me: you keep the same eyes all your life
  • child I am babysitting: *touches eyes* whoa
Anonymous asked:
Whats your fave position in bed

horanyewest:

sleeping